On Our Shoulders

February is finally coming to a close today. While I do not yet know what March holds, I can only pray that with the arrival of spring (the snow forecasted for Tuesday notwithstanding) will come an inner refreshment that I desperately need. This past month has been a pressure-packed struggle in many ways, most of which is coming from work. While I was out hiking with a bunch of Webelos scouts yesterday, I stole a few moments of contemplative solitude outdoors, to try to come to grips with how I'm responding to this pressure.

Friday was a bitterly frustrating day. In a moment of escape, I latched onto a featured article about Joannie Rochette, the Canadian Olympian who lost her mother to a heart attack right before the start of the Games. Her story is probably the most heart-rending story to come from these Olympics, as she skated herself to the Bronze through tremendous emotional loss. Within this article is written one of the best lines I've ever read (emphasis mine):

"Rochette didn’t shoulder the hopes of a nation. Rather, she was pulled onto the shoulders of the Canadian people and the figure skating community. Not even the most forlorn blackheart could fail to have been moved by this tale of triumph."

When I read that line, I found myself deeply, deeply moved. When you contrast Rochette with the skaters who placed above her, each of whom carried the intense pressure of expectation from their home countries, you get a remarkable view of the complex nature of the pressures we all face. One can easily conclude by their countenance that Kim Yu-Na and Mao Asada (skating for South Korea and Japan, respectively) felt tremendous pressure to carry the load and bring home the prize for their nations. While you'd like to think the best, you can't help but wonder about the reception Mao Asada will receive once she gets home with her Silver. Truly these two seemed to be shouldering the hopes of their nations. But Rochette, in her deepest grief, found herself inspired and carried by the spirit of a nation that somehow reached out to her to lift her up to the performance of a lifetime. After watching both her short and long programs, I found it nearly impossible to not be moved to tears by the moment. Tonight, Rochette will carry the Canadian flag for her team in the closing ceremonies.

None of us are immune to pressure. There are those who place tremendous pressure upon us to meet expectations. We put tremendous pressure upon ourselves to meet our own expectations. And when that pressure builds and builds and builds, it is easy for us to start transferring the pressure we feel to our other relationships, putting pressure on our spouses, our friends, the people who work for us, and even our children. No one places a greater pressure on me than I do myself. Often, I will either shoulder it, or I will start to crack and begin transferring it onto others, continuing a highly unhealthy cycle. But there is a better way.

When I read the line about being pulled onto the shoulders of others, I was reminded of a podcast my brother-in-law pointed me to, in which a marathon runner tried to describe the emotion of knowing that there were people who would go out of their way to cheer, support and otherwise encourage the athlete to continue reaching for the goal. And therein lies a remedy perhaps. We may knowingly or unknowingly apply pressure to others, perhaps because we ourselves are feeling the pressure from others or ourselves. Instead, perhaps we should take a different approach, becoming the kind of people who are willing to carry others on our shoulders to a degree, to come alongside and encourage - not to apply pressure, but to help lift others through the pressure. You can't make the pressure just go away, but you can assist in helping others to put it in a healthy context, and to help lift them through it. Furthermore, we also may need to become the kind of people who will allow others to carry us on their shoulders, to acknowledge and accept the help we may need but are afraid to acknowledge. By becoming people who allow ourselves to be carried, and willing to help carry others (sharing one another's burdens, etc), we may just find our own spirits lifted, and ourselves better able to deal with the pressures we face.

Because, to repeat, it is unlikely that we can make the pressure all go away. It is also risky to rely too much on others to carry us all the time - because people will sometimes let us down. But knowing that we have been carried during difficult times (think Footsteps in the Sand) can soften our hearts to better respond to the pressure we are facing, to not allow it to darken us to the point that we begin to lose faith and lash out.

Why am I saying all this? Because I need to hear it. This one story, of a young woman skating through the grief and pain in the loss of her mother, of a young athlete carried upon the shoulders of a nation in her hour of need, this one story demonstrates for me a powerful witness of our life's journey. As a believer, I reach for the prize for which God has called me heavenward, and in the company of fellow believers and the Spirit Himself, there is hope for the full realization of everlasting joy. I have been a poor witness. I have transferred the pressure I feel onto others, at times unfairly. I need to correct that, and become a person who once again finds ways to lift others up. I feel like I've forgotten how to do that, but I suspect it is not as hard as one might think.


Yes, all this from a simple walk in the woods. Simple. But real.